Saturday, September 12, 2009


If you’re looking for a locally grown dry cleaner, this one’s here.

If you’re looking for a locally grown dry cleaner who takes your money while ruining your clothes, keep on reading.

Dirty Origin

Back in the day before I knew better, I found a new dry cleaner that I visited for few months. “Bibbentuckers” had drive-up service and since I’m a busy ad guy with little time to iron, I rationalized paying them a premium for cleaning my clothes.

My bi-weekly bills, however, started to top 3-digits left of the decimal and I started becoming aware that while the clothes were nicely packaged ($6 at the time for a linen shirt), I could throw away my clothes and buy new ones for not much more money.

The true test was the day when I pulled a blue shirt from the closet while getting ready for work. It had a weird banded stain on the collar where it looked like the pressing machine was left on while someone daydreamed over a tuna sandwich while watching “Days Of Our Lives."

Rumpled, I put it back in the closet and reached for another. Same result.

There were three shirts in all that had the freaky collar stain and I was cleaned out of blue shirts to wear.

Collar Hollar

I took the shirts to Bibbentuckers and explained the situation to the employee. They said they’d run the shirts through again and for me to come back in 2-3 days, which I did. I assumed they would have addressed the matter and put a note on the clothes if in fact they couldn’t solve the problem. What’s worse is they charged me to process the shirts again and as you guessed, the pressed stains were all still there.

Bibbenfuckers Was Born

I took the shirts back again and explained the situation. I said that while I had gone ahead and paid them the first time to fix the error of their ways, the stains were still there. I didn’t understand why it was “hand over fist” to take my money while paying no attention to fixing the stain. Not even a “Hey buddy – we can’t fix it.”

So after the second chance to fix things, my shirts were ruined.

Pissed, I was left baffled how Bibbenfuckers could ignore the situation. They have a customer id card tied to an account with all my information. And to this day no calls. No inquiries as to where my money has gone.

Which reminds me…

Ode To My Three Shirts

My blue shirts of three

Oh how I miss thee

Hate me not

I have not forgot

They took my money.

They ruined you shirts

The dirty cleaners Bibbentuckers

Run amuck by motherfuckers

Cleaned Out Again? You betcha! Consumer Victim Style. Read all about it here.